Triggers and trauma in tabletop roleplaying games

Some games (particularly indie games) can allow players and GMs to introduce sensitive subjects into the narrative. Is it possible for games to handle potentially triggering scenes or plot threads without ignoring a player's limits?

I have obsessively written and rewritten this post several times. This is a really important subject to me and to a lot of people and I want to do it justice without implying that there's only one way to handle this properly.

Some of the main ways used to try to prevent pushing anything beyond a player's comfort in tabletop gaming are lines, veils and X cards.

Lines: Are set at the start of the game (although can be added to later). This is where the players, ideally facilitated by the GM can decide "I'm not comfortable with this topic, I don't want it in the game for any reason". (For example, you may decide that abuse shouldn't occur in the game).

Veils: Are also set at the start of the game (and again can be decided later if the need arises). If something is set as a veil then it may occur in the game but it won't be described in any detail. (You may decide not to describe sex scenes in Monsterhearts for example).

X cards: Another way to do this is using an X card (and this can be in in addition to the lines and veils discussion). The GM draws an X on card and if anyone feels uncomfortable then they can hold up the card, and the GM or the player who is talking at that moment will move away from the subject.

GMs who do this are great. I've seen it used in cons and I've seen it used in private games and it suggests a consideration of the player's private life and a commitment to the enjoyment of the game.

So, are they a total solution? I don't think so. Personally I had an experience where something triggering came up in a game and I wasn't able to verbalise that I was having difficulty with the topic. It's hard to explain why I acted the way I did and I'm not sure that I understand it myself. The GM gave me two options after a bad roll and the non- traumatic one made complete sense for the character's personality. Except that something about the phrasing and the framing and the fact that I didn't expect it made me unable to stop my character being abused in the game, although I easily would've been able to. This then bled through to my real life and left me feeling a bit vulnerable for a day or so. (This was absolutely not the GM's fault – I gave no indication that I felt like that and hadn't made him aware that abuse was a line - I hadn't realised it was.) If it happened again I would like to think I would get up from the table until I felt calmer.

There have been times when I have been unable to express at the start of the game that something is a line for me. It's not so bad around friends but with strangers there's something about it for me which feels like I'm telling people things about myself that I don't want them to know. It can feel like there's shame attached to some types of trauma sometimes. (This is not advice – if you are able to you should absolutely talk about where your lines are at the start of the game – you have no reason to feel ashamed).

Someone suggested to me for a game I designed that I could use a Microscope type palette, which means each player says explicitly what they want and don't want at the start of the game. It may be easier to say 'I want dragons and magic in the game and I don't want there to be time travel or sexual abuse'.

Maybe.

And to complicate matters further, the subjects that upset me aren't always upsetting in game. A lot of it is in the framing. And sometimes playing out subjects which are a bit painful and personal can be cathartic, particularly if I'm aware in advance that they're going to be in the game. There is something that draws a lot of people to games which explore the darker aspects of life. There are many enjoyable lighter games too, but there a lot of games that make you feel something stronger, almost painful, in the moment and that isn't a bad thing.

I have no solutions. I really wish I did. All I can say is that players – if you think a game is going to contain difficult material try to let someone know (even if it's the GM in private). If something comes up which you find too painful or triggering you can say stop and no one should ask why and the game can move on to something else. (If someone else says stop when you're the one speaking please don't ask why – just move on.) Put your mental health first and leave the table if you have to.

GMs, please try to look out for your players. I know it's difficult and you can't read someone's mind and if you want to make a game scary, or gritty or hard-hitting you should absolutely do that. (I say this as someone who is planning a hopefully uncomfortably scary Cthulhu Dark game so I may be a bit biased). But if a player looks distressed it would be good if you could try to check on them, maybe discretely while you're taking a break and if someone is really anxious they might need to leave the game early. Please also consider if a discussion about lines and veils, and / or X cards is needed for your game, particularly if you don't know the players very well.

We are all in this together. My experience of role-players is that we look out for each other. Please lets look out for each other when things are difficult.